"What Have You Done For Us Lately"

The other day, I was fortunate enough to have one of the leading ladies of our local library come and sit down in my office. Mary and I began to chat about the usual pleasantries, when she informed me that she, and her co-worker, (two women that our community has the utmost respect for), would be retiring after 20 plus years of running our local treasure of a library. These two women are so close, that neither one of them could imagine working without the other by her side, so they decided to take the leap together, and retire.

This is a not just your every day run-of-the-mill town library. The children’s section was always a hub of excitement. The colors, learning, dress up, reading, educating, artwork, sculpture, themes, theater, cozy nooks, etc, just ooze from the room as soon as you walk in. As an adult, I would get excited to go there! It was fun! And the two amazing ladies that ran it, with the help of many other giving souls, became parental figures to us all. They were always coming up with some brilliant, creative way to pass on the love of reading and learning to our little ones. Now that my children are older, I, of course do not frequent the children’s section anymore and I have since moved to a neighboring town. But I have missed it. Just as part of me misses having children of the age who want to go there.

While talking to Mary, we chatted about some of the old times, and when I asked her what prompted her to retire at a younger age then most, she answered with a changed expression of sadness: “The parents are not the same. Instead of parents getting involved the way they used to, they only want to know what you can do for them and their children, not the other way around. It’s just not the same (shaking her head). The community feel has changed. It’s more about the individual and less about the community as a whole.”

This troubles me. How disturbing. How sad.

As we continue to isolate ourselves more and more and become increasingly electronic and downloadable, I ask us all: What have you done for your community lately?

How difficult is it to say: “I have a bunch of books that my kids don’t read anymore, let me donate them” or “I will bake muffins for our story time on Friday” or “Here is a $2 donation. Today I will forego my store bought coffee in a styrofoam cup.”

It doesn’t take a huge commitment. Just do small. Small things matter.

I know many volunteers that are involved with our kids, seniors, those that are homeless, unhealthy, those in need. But from what I am hearing and witnessing, fewer and fewer of us want to take the time and trouble to extend ourselves anymore. We have, on the whole, become a very ME driven society.

While my family and friends will always be on the top of my priority list, in fact, they are the only entries on my priority list, it is essential that I show my children how to give. And give without the prospect of ever receiving anything back. What I receive back is not always visible. It comes in waves of pride and heartfelt caring for those around me and for wanting my community to be just a little bit better, nicer, more welcoming. Without that feeling, where you live, work and play is less desirable to everyone.

On a different level, one of my good friends is a giver/volunteer/if I see a wrong, I must right it, type of person. She is proactive. She makes things happen. She builds playgrounds and football fields and running tracks and (tries wholeheartedly) to push for public kindergarten (which eventually came to be). Those that are uncomfortable with her passion label her as a “bitch”. Yup. She is. And our community is better because of that bitch. She has literally changed the face of our community.

Maybe that is why people are afraid to extend themselves. It brings them into the forefront of an issue. It shines a spotlight sometimes. It can be a burden if others criticize how you focus your passion or attention. So, ultimately, it could be that we shy away for fear of being judged. That is very unfortunate. Maybe it is a lesson to us all to be less judgemental of others.

So I ask, and if you don’t care to hear it, then hit the delete button: “What have you done to make your community, the life of someone around you, just a little bit better?”

Only you know where to go from here…

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. once said: “We are prone to judge success by the index of our salaries or the size of our automobiles, rather than by the quality of our service relationship to humanity.”

How is your relationship with humanity?

(* this blog is dedicated to my friend Lori, two amazing librarians, and all of the caring volunteers out there. Some names in this blog have been changed)