Recently, someone I know commented that he would never blog. Or could never be a blogger. He felt that even more than sex and money, people want recognition and that the act of blogging wreaked of wanting desperately to be recognized.
Some voice their opinion that the act of blogging is for the self absorbed and is all about self promotion. Or that bored housewives and busy working mothers, instead of diving head first into a wine or xanax induced haze, take to their laptops amidst piles of laundry and the latest school fundraising form, to reinforce their value. To be heard out loud.
Some of that maybe true. I like to be validated. Some of it may be false. In addition to finding solace in my laptop, I often drink wine while blogging anyway.
I will say, however, that I want money more than blogging. Offer me a substantial amount of money and I will throw my laptop out the window.
I definitely want sex more than blogging. Maybe just not right now. Later.
Anyway, to set my record straight (and only mine, as I would never generalize) blogging is a forum in which I feel we can reconnect with others around us. To the contrary, writing what moves you, motivates you, interests you, angers you, bewilders you and scares you has almost nothing to do with recognition. For me, a very controlled person and self admitted control freak, it is a way to add vulnerability to my life. I want to tell others how I could possibly be screwing things up at home, so that when others make mistakes, they can be assured that they are not alone. There is nothing more isolating, than screwing up by yourself. There is also no greater triumph than doing right by those who love and respect you. So it is just as important to share the triumphs.
Not that blogging is for everybody. It is not.
But how is it any different than a man sitting around a fire with his friends strumming his guitar and singing? Or an artist at an art gallery showing her work? Or an actor on stage? Or a chef preparing a meal? They are all looking for recognition too, aren't they? But is that their #1 motivation for doing what they do? I don't think so. It is for the purpose of creating, expressing, and touching that chord inside each one of us that says "I get it" or "I feel it."
That is why I personally blog. What can become frustrating, is when those who are closest to you, have no interest in what you do. Those that know you sing, play the guitar, act, write, play a sport, sew, roller derby, blog, etc., and never care to even experience it with you. If you care about someone as a friend or love someone with all of your heart, not taking interest and/or having discussion about what they love is actually the more self-absorbed act, isn't it? You don't have to mention it everyday. Just once is fine. Mention it and talk about it just once, for a few minutes, if that's all you can afford.
The reason I blog is two fold. I enjoy that common thread that runs through all of us. The one that goes right through our emotions and makes us human. That thread is the ultimate worldly connector. It goes through almost everyone despite your age, sex, race, sexual orientation, religion or social status. I am addicted to that feeling of camaraderie in that we all have similar experiences and feel similar feelings. If you do not feel that way about others on even a small level, then my heart weeps for you. In a world that grows increasingly more technical and the overwhelming reports of families feeling isolated from the rest of the world, with Sunday dinners a distant memory, and family game nights in short supply, I live for the connection. Without that connection, we lose. As a human race, we may actually be losing.
Blogging certainly doesn't save our whole great big world, but it may help make a handful of people's lives better and anything that can make just one person's life better has my stamp of approval. Just like a great song that may ease your mind or a homemade meal that warms your soul, reading the thoughts of others that touch you or make you think, offers solace and even rounds out the spirit.
For some, they look to their creative side and to the expression of it, to fill a void. Voids created by family discord or unfulfilled hopes and dreams. Voids that lost friendships or the death of loved ones, carve out.You may sit down and read a book or sing a song. I write. It helps me cope.
Since I started writing again, it has proven to be a really cool outlet for me. If you haven't found yours yet, go on that search for it. Despite what others may say or NOT say, it's totally worth the effort. If you say to yourself things like: "I have always wanted to take a cooking class, or learn a foreign language or travel or learn how to play the piano or take an art class or (fill in the blank)...then what are you waiting for? You certainly aren't getting any younger. Start now, don't put it off. Make the time, don't tell me you don't have the time. We always say we don't have the time, but we do. It's just an excuse to blame time for our small secret fears of inadequacy.
Just think of how inadvertently, your special thing may effect not just you, but the life of someone else. Life changers are not always propelled forward by big things. Little things matter.
So head on out your chosen path, whether its to take up aerial acrobatics or zoology. Blaze your own trail or flow right into the mainstream, or somewhere in between, what ever you are comfortable with. When you come across negativity or a downer or a naysayer ask them what their creative outlet is or how they fill their void. And then, if they have something, congratulate them for finding it. If they look at you funny and have no idea what you are talking about, then tell them how happy you are that you have found yours.
